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Thursday, April 28, 2016


Only Allah knows what do i really feels right now..
should i say,"im hurt?sad?" or should i just cry over and over again?

"i wish i could turn back time,i dont wanna be with him,and i dont wanna know him!" that is how much pain that i take right now.

Moving on for a few days is actually not easy for someone like me.
It hurts that i always told myself that im okay,but in the end,when i was alone.. back to square one. BOOM! im sad again. "happy sad happy sad" if Allah wasnt here,i will be losing my way by now.

Its just that im confused in balancing those feelings. i mean why cant i just move on and be happy like a normal people? i know.. this is just a beginning to have a new bright future ahead me,but sometimes,i need more support. and to be honest,im not strong enough when it comes to love :( i wish i can be end like a love story that i wrote,but too bad,real life is cruel. There's no happy ending,but if u do,you are one of the luckiest man/woman.

i wish i have a stone heart like him,rude,no mercy and heart breaker!
why cant i just being so mean like he did to me?im so weak & crybaby.
and i wish i can just wipe this feelings away just a couple of second,then GONE!

i always showed up to him and always trying to fix and fix everything,and say sorry for a million times,
but nothing happen.. he is still wanna end it.
No matter what,i have to stay away & stay strong ,IM NOT gonna texting or find him back.. cos i have a DIGNITY.
its okay to spelled it out to this blog,cos this is my diary,i can say whatever i want,atleast i dont wanna bother him anymore.. and atleast day by day i can feel much better... im not perfect.. it takes time for me to cure..

O Allah,it hurts. give me a strength. give me a way to be happy again....

"Lotsa lotsa" Drama :D

Hey Assalamualaikum? :D

How are you doing? Fine? good? sad? terrified? GREAT?  :O No matter how do you feel about today,
Just smile and says, "Alhamdulillah" see, kan MANIS with the smile :))))) hehehehehe

Well, i decided to delete my previous post about my ex (what a waste of time,writing it over half an hour lolll), cos' i dont wanna ruin my PRECIOUS moment with a "lotsa lotsa" bulls in my head. HAHA!
omg i gotta stop saying "lotsa lotsa"  cos im kinda addicted to it now,or should i said,quotes of the day? hahahahha.
Well,let me skip that one,before you branding me with "annoying" sticky notes on my head,yikes! thats not gonna be pretty :/ hmm hahahahah! okay okay, stop it Ayuni. :x

Truth be told, im gonna change my novel,Topic,contains and everything.
Yeap! its more like... true story.Not really concentrate 100% about love,Its about life,a real life,
what people wanna read,What people wanna see is a true story that we share and in the real world that we stand. thats what im gonna wrote.
BUT i wont let you know who's the real person and where that story's came from.  Im so excited. 
im still working on it with "lotsa lotsa" research hahahah! 
just wish me luck and pray for me yeah? :)

Okay guys,post it again soon.